National Adoption Awareness Month

November is Adoption Awareness Month. I was going to mention this earlier in the month but guess I was too busy with my "Where is the final homestudy report?" obsession. (Which by the way, I still don't have but since I am trying not to dwell on it, that's all I will say about that...for now.) As we have revealed our plans to adopt, we've gotten several (often blunt) questions. Most are well meaning I suppose but still intrusive. The most common question being WHY? I have tried to answer with "Why not?" but that sounds evasive...like I don't want to talk about it. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have to force myself to find another topic to talk about most days. So in honor of Adoption Awareness Month, I wanted to capture my own thoughts on how we got to this amazing journey.

When Jon and I started trying to conceive, my Dr. said to give it 6 months and then come back if we weren't successful. I gave it 4. Hey, I was 40 at the time and was on a mission! Over the next several months, Jon and I both went through several appointments, tests, procedures, etc. None were fun and some were worse than others. We ended up at the Fertility Endocronologist's office. This was not a nice man. He was way too intense and serious, and frankly did NOTHING to put us at ease. BTW, if that big, scary "INFERTILITY" sign above his door ever goes missing, I should be the first suspect - I hate that sign. I did lots of research and he is apparently "The guy." People drive from all over to see him. I drove 5 miles and it was too far. Anyway, due to several "factors", he suggested daily fertility injections and artificial insemination, possibly IVF. Based on said "factors", we were looking at about a 25% chance of success and then about a 50% chance of miscarriage. Hmmmm.... I'm no mathematical genius but I certainly didn't like the sound of that. That was a rough few months. I do remember one stellar meltdown right in the middle of the Houston airport. I guess that is one good thing about starting this at 40, the Doctors sort of "cut to the chase." I have friends that endured years of this, not months. I can't imagine.

Jon and I started researching these fertility drugs and procedures and also started researching adoption at the same time. Really, there was only one that we were drawn to. One that we kept coming back to. One that seemed right for us. Don't get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for anyone that takes the fertility route. It just wasn't for us. Frankly, being pumped full of hormones and having to listen to Dr. Serious say "At your age...." was not going to end nicely. I'm sure I would have scratched his eyes out. Sure, I could have found another Dr. but it wasn't about that. Jon swears Dr. Serious secretely works for the adoption agencies. Come to think of it, I should send him a Thank You note for helping us to reach this decision. For us, it wasn't about being pregnant, it was about being a family. There is not a shread of doubt that this is how we were meant to become a family. I have received comments suggesting that adoption was something that we had to resort to. No, this is something that we chose. And we couldn't be more content and at peace with our choice.