What Ever You Do - DON'T PANIC!!!

Ahhh, winter in the South. There is a CHANCE of winter precipitation here tomorrow. I am watching the news right now and they are killing me - you would not believe the drama. They have people stationed throughout the city with live reports. I kid you not, you could take every sentence they are saying and substitute "swarm of locusts" with "chance of snow" and their reports would make more sense. They have stopped just short of telling everyone to notify their next of kin and make sure your donor card is filled out. Yes, I am exaggerating but not as much as these reporters. This is entertainment, people. One poor sap was just reporting live standing outside with a round thermometer larger than his head showing that is is now below 40 degrees!!! Yes, it was 70 degrees just a couple of hours ago but still this is waaaaaaay over the top. My friends in the north would just love this!!!

Sure, I could be eating these words when we are covered in ice tomorrow, no food in the house and I get stuck at the airport trying to catch my 4:00 flight. Oh man, I just remembered I have an appointment to get my hair cut and colored before heading to the airport tomorrow - we have a Christmas party Saturday night and I am a shaggy gray dog at the moment. Ok now this is serious. This town shuts down if there is a speck of ice on the ground. If this winter weather messes up my hair appointment, I am going to be peeved.

P.S. Thanks for all of your nice comments and emails regarding my last pathetic post. I'm still working on the "positive" list. How many items does it take to make a list?

Random Confessions Of A Waiting Mom

(I apologize for anything not spelled correctly - blogger spell checker ate my post twice so I gave up.)

1. I didn’t believe anyone when they said the wait was harder than the paperchase. I still don’t think it would be harder if we knew how long we will be waiting.


2. While I was paper chasing, I could see progress, I could put an X in a cell of a spreadsheet with each document, with each certification, with each check that I wrote and you can not imagine the joy that each X gave me.


3. Once we were LID (paperchase officially done), each batch of referrals was progress and that made me happy.


4. Referrals still make me happy but they don’t make me feel any closer to our daughter. This is awful to admit but I only see progress when I see someone with an LID of August or September 2006. There are actually people behind us in the wait.


5. This time last year, I was chasing paper like a mad woman. I am sure that I drove Jon crazy with the urgency of every single step. But I just knew that if I hurried up, we would have “Lulu” home by this Christmas. And you know what - If I had it to do over again, I would do the exact same thing.


6. I told very few people this but I hung a stocking for “Lulu” last year – she got stacking cups. I think she will like them.


7. We are so far behind on our Agency training that it is embarrassing. I am still reading every single book on the list. For some bizarre reason, I just can’t bring myself to actually log into the website and answer a few questions.


8. Actually, some of the questions in the last section that we did complete were insulting. “What will you do if you get to China and your child is ill?” UMMMM….”Do whatever it takes to find her the proper medical care. Move mountains if we have to.” I’m not trying to over simplify things – I know it would be terrifying to find yourself in that situation and I’ve not been there. But as far as I am concerned, you might as well ask me “What would you do if you gave birth and your child was ill?”


9. Unfortunately, due to situations that I have never written about here (and never will) they have to ask such questions.


10. I opened the door to the guest room closet recently while looking for something and I actually gasped when I saw all of the dresses hanging there. I just hadn’t looked in there in quite a while. They actually caught me by surprise. I immediately closed the door and walked away.
11. Yes, it is still the guest room and I am glad. I know that it helps some people to get the nursery ready but I seriously could not bear to walk past a nursery in our house just yet. Besides, where would I go when Jon’s snoring is keeping me awake?
12. No, we are not going to get a call any day now with our referral. I know some countries work like that – China doesn’t. I realize that your next door neighbor’s cousin’s butcher, baker or candlestick maker got a surprise call one day. China doesn’t work that way. I’ll post a better explanation eventually but you get in line and there are several people in front of us. They don’t pull a name out of a hat.
13. I had most of our documents notorized and shipped at the UPS store a couple of blocks from our house. They were awesome and made me promise to bring our daughter to meet them. I have switched UPS stores because I am tired of them asking “when”? Yes, I know they mean well and I love and appreciate their enthusiasm. I am just tired of “when”.
14. For my next post, I will write about some positive aspects of the wait - may take a while.

Back Up

Yes, I know the blog was down for a while. Easy fix but frankly I just couldn't be bothered. I think I've posted maybe three times in the last couple of months because I just needed a break. Not sure why, I love being here and love reading others but I just needed a break. So when the blog was down, I just took my sweet time getting it back up and running. I've switched over to the beta version so we will see how it goes. Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!!!!

Going To The Chapel.....

This is a ridiculously overdue post but I am trying hard not to lose my "most pathetic blogger ever" status. Anyway, my brother Paul and his girlfriend are getting married!!!! They are very excited and we are very excited for them. Of course I think my first question was "are you eloping or do I get to buy a new dress?" Hey, you have to be prepared. Anyway, an exact date hasn't been set but probably some time next spring and the wedding will be in New Orleans. Can't wait - I love weddings. He told my parents on their 46th wedding anniversary which is kind of cool also. Congratulations Paul and Jennifer.

Still Here

I can't believe that it's been two weeks since I posted. Not that anyone is on the edge of their seat wondering but everything is fine here - just super busy. Nothing exciting, just busy. Even Dad, one of my most faithful readers, hasn't asked where my posts have been. Oh yeah, it's football season - I've probably been replaced by the LSU fan message boards. (Still seeing how far I need to push Dad before getting him to leave a comment.)

In the last two weeks, something had to give and since I want to keep my job and my husband, I guess I gave the blog a rest.

Last Wednesday (yes, a week ago) Jon and I did celebrate our third wedding anniversary. Well I was out of town of course so we didn't celebrate on Wednesday but that's what weekends are for. I don't have any anniversary pictures so I'll share a couple of pictures from our wedding.

Thanks babe for still making me laugh!!!

Best Email Ever

Hello Karen, this is Ivy speaking. I just wanted to tell you that I love you. And that's it.
Bye.
Ivy

(In my inbox this morning - typed by my brother-in-law)

I LOVE YOU TOO IVY!!!!!!

Maybe I Was Wrong...

I have to admit when I first heard that the Saints were going to play in the Superdome tonight, I didn't really know how to react. OK, I admit it - I was annoyed. There are so many bigger problems to deal with yet we can figure out how to continue with the football??? Many people can not find housing and the suicide rate is up 300% in New Orleans. And further east, in Mississippi, the progress is even slower.

I remember (barely) when the superdome was built. Growing up, I went to several Saints games and went to the Super Bowl there in 1981. As a kid, I think I saw the circus there. I remember how funny it was that the trapeze was flying below some of the seats. One summer in college, I worked downtown and my carpool parked in the dome everyday.

A year ago, with a house full of family members that evacuated, I watched all the horrors unfold at the Superdome. I could not imagine it ever being the "Superdome" again. So when I heard the game was going to be played there tonight, I had mixed feelings.

Don't get me wrong - I love to see the progress. I want the nation to know how strong the people of New Orleans and the entire Gulf Coast region are - trust me, they would not be there right now if they weren't strong. I want people to travel to New Orleans and spend loads and loads of money. However, people need to know that there is still a lot to be done. The people checking you in at your hotel and the person serving you that hot steamy cup of Gumbo may be struggling to find a place to live. Yes, the French Quarter and uptown may be open for business. However, people that work in that part of the city do not necessarily live in that part of the city. They may be going home to a FEMA trailer or worse.

So, I sat down tonight to watch the first professional football game that I have watched in YEARS (sorry, just not a fan). And it felt good. I was very curious (and skeptical) on how it was going to be portrayed. I did not watch the entire game but from what I saw, I think the message was good. Yes world, the spirit of New Orleans lives. There are parts of New Orleans that are open for business. We are able to have a football game and we would love for you to come and visit (and did I mention to spend money?). But life there is still difficult at best and we can't forget that. I don't have the answers. I do think two things that New Orleans will need for years to come are
1- the continued support of the nation and
2 - for the people of New Orleans to come together and work together.

So, hey if a football game can help with those two things then I say GO SAINTS!!!!

OH, and Bono was HOT!!!

Balance Schmalance

First of all, thanks to everyone who helped to wish my Dad a Happy Birthday last week- you guys are great!!! Also, an update to this post. I received a 911 call from my sister yesterday from the mall where she spotted stirrup leggings. As if.


A few weeks ago, I was on my way to a client and passed the campus of a large, well known technology company. I won't use the name but chances are if you on a computer enough to be reading this, you know this company. As I passed the main entrance, I noticed a trailer parked in front of the building that said "Mobile Dentist". Hmmm. And then I noticed the cheesy slogan regarding some nonsense about helping people to balance life and work. Oh please - you have got to be kidding me you heartless corporation!!!! Some people may find this convenient - I find it ridiculous. You mean you are going to let me actually get up from my cubicle and see a dentist chosen by YOU in a TRAILER. I bet that lovely trailer of yours is outfitted with wireless so that I can continue working while being lectured on the benefits of flossing. Sign me up.

Last time I checked, most people go to the dentist twice a year. (Unless you are having additional work done which I am guessing you don't want to have done in a trailer.) What's next, once a year the stirrups are going to arrive in my cubicle for a quick checkup? Trust me this company isn't solving world peace, world hunger, speeding up the referral process or replacing the calories and fat in Cracky Kreme donuts with vitamins and minerals. If that was the case, I would be all for holding these employees hostage. There is another type of institution where people do everything they need to do on "campus". It's called prison!!! People, we are NOT that important.

If you want to help me balance my life and work, just give me a couple of hours twice a year to visit MY dentist!!! Better yet, take that mobile dentist out to people that otherwise would not be able to afford to go to the dentist and bring me a mobile massage or a mobile manicure!!!

Happy Birthday Dad

Today is my Dad's birthday!!! He loves to say that he has NEVER had a birthday party. Don't believe a word of it. In fact, just last year my sister and I threw a party for him complete with a cake, streamers and balloons. Well, there was the fact that he wasn't actually at the birthday party but really that's just a detail. Hey, we all had a good time and sent him pictures.

If you think that is bad, one year my parents sent me a package in the mail for my birthday. Inside I found deflated birthday balloons, blown out candles, used decorations and a videotape(yes, it was back in the day of videotapes.) I played the videotape and it was my mom, dad, brother and their dog Buster all singing Happy Birthday to me, blowing out the candles and eating MY cake!!!!

So anyway Happy Birthday Dad!!! Help me out people. Leave a comment wishing him a Happy Birthday - maybe a "cyber party" will satisfy him.

I Love You Dad!!!

Who Is Responsible For This??

I have learned some very disturbing news recently. I've tried to ignore it thinking it would just go away. Unfortunately, it looks like it is not going away and I am going to be forced to discuss it here. So here it goes.

Who the heck decided that leggings should come back in fashion!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, I know, fashions come and go. But leggings......that is something that should NEVER come back. Sure, I wore them years ago when they were in style and I've seen the pictures. Let me say that I am shocked that my loved ones let me go out in public like that. Really, they should be ashamed of themselves. I don't care what you do to leggings, they are NOT pants!!!!! No one looks good in them (at least I like to believe that is true.) I don't care how popular they become. Let me go on record telling anyone listening if I so much as think about putting on a pair of those things, you have every right to take those hideous spandex/lycra things and strangle me with them.

That brings me back to the question who decided they should come back in style?? Odds are they are tall and skinny. I say we find them and force them to eat dozens and dozens of Cracky Kreme donuts. Who is with me???

Where Were You?

There are some events that you will always remember EXACTLY where you were when they happened. September 11, 2001 is obviously one of them. I had just returned through JFK airport from Amsterdam the week before. I flew to Houston on September 10, 2001. The morning of September 11, 2001, I was in my hotel room in Houston getting some work done before a mid-morning meeting with a client. I had the news on but the volume was turned down and I couldn't see the tv from where I was working. At some point I realized what time it was and stepped away from my work to get dressed for the day. I passed by the TV and saw the images. Both planes had already hit the twin towers.

I immediately called my parents. They didn't even know yet which is unusual since they are avid news watchers. I was traveling constantly at the time. My office was a plane ticket, a cell phone and a laptop. I wanted my parents to know I was safe in Houston. When I was on the phone with Mom, the news of the pentagon hit was announced. As soon as I got off the phone with Mom, I immediately called my friend Andree'. Her husband was traveling as much as I was at the time so I wanted to know that he was ok. I didn't even know Jon then, we met a few months later.

I did not have a rental car so I just hung out in Houston for a couple of days waiting for a car or a flight. Like most everyone else, I just sat glued to the TV watching the images and trying to understand it all. I can't even begin to imagine what it was like to be in New York on that day. I was finally able to get a car and drove home since there were still no flights. I will never forget going to the airport to retrieve my car. The silence was deadening. You don't realize how loud it is in the parking garage of an airport until it's quiet. For some reason, even after watching the events unfold for a couple of days, the silence of the airport shocked me. I threw up in the garage before getting into my car.

I know that I am posting this at the end of the day but my thoughts have been with those that lost their lives five years ago. My thoughts are with those that lost loved ones. My thoughts are with those that witnessed it first hand and are still haunted by the memories.

Jewelry Party A Success

The jewelry party last Thursday was great fun. It was a great excuse to spend a couple of days with my sister and a couple of hours with friends that I don't see nearly enough. Thanks to everyone who came or sent orders. Here's a look at all the pretty things we had on display.

What I did not mention in my previous post is that I have actually decided to be an independent representative for this jewelry company. So Thursday was actually my kick-off party. Besides having fun with my sis and friends, I earned a few hundred dollars plus a few hundred dollars in FREE jewelry. What girl doesn't like free jewelry? I've never imagined myself doing anything like this but I fell in love with the jewelry and the people and decided what the heck. When I get a chance, I am sure that I will be updating this blog with a link to my website and some additional updates. In the meantime, if you are curious what it's all about, just shoot me an email at the address on the side. Just don't ask me how I am planning on doing this along with my current somewhat demanding job - I'm figuring that out as I go.

Officially Great

Although I think Jon and I have always been pretty good at the Aunt and Uncle gig, we are now officially GREAT. Jon's niece had a baby girl last Monday, 8/28 which makes us Great Aunt and Great Uncle. Since I was out of town all last week, I didn't get to see her until yesterday. She is absolutely beautiful and making all the squeaky baby noises that I love so much. Here she is at just a couple of days old being held by her Great Grandmother (Jon's Mom). I told you she is beautiful.

Dinner With Andree'

I was out of town AGAIN last week, this time in Seattle. However, I got to spend a little time with my friend Andree' - totally took the sting out of being on the road for the fourth week in a row!!! Gosh it was so great to see her. I met Andree' in 1987 when we were both fresh out of college. Is it really possible that I am old enough to have been friends with someone for almost 20 years that I met as an adult??? Can't be.

It was a great visit although too short. I spent the night at her house Thursday night and then left for the airport around 1:30 Friday afternoon. She and her husband have four beautiful (and very entertaining) kids which have grown so much since I last saw them.

I couldn't wait to hear about the 60 mile 3 day that Andree' had just completed. OH MY GOSH. It's hard enough to wrap my head around walking 60 miles. I had not even considered the entire element of sleeping in a tent (which you set up yourself) for two nights and using port-a-potties!!!!! That adds an entire dimension of discomfort that I had never even considered. I guess I imagined that after walking 20 miles, I would be hanging out at the Four Seasons recharging for the next day. Apparently not. I totally admired her for doing this before but now I am just in awe. Seriously if you know ANYONE participating in one of these events, support them any way you can. Donate money, watch their kids while they train, give them pep talks, take a walk with them while they train, whatever you can do. The Seattle team raised over 6.8 million dollars towards breast cancer research. WALK ON!!!!

Dr. Ivy Makes House Calls

Here she is in her full Dr. attire before heading over to Mom's for her post surgery check up. Looks like she is prepared complete with prescription pad. I called Mom after Dr. Ivy was there to make sure she was still in one piece. I've been "treated" by Dr. Ivy and I can tell you that she is fairly thorough with her questions. However, every symptom I've reported including upset stomach, allergies, sore throat, mosquito bites, has been met with the same conclusion by Dr. Ivy. "I'm going to have to cut it out."

Let's Hear It For The Girls!!!!!!

Specifically two very good friends of mine, Mary and Andree'. I am blessed to be able to have both of these women as friends. Earlier this year, Mary was diagnosed with breast cancer. They caught it early so the prognosis is good. She has handled this diagnosis with all the courage, humor and faith that makes her so special. You may have noticed comments on here from "Mary(get your mammogram)" and "Almost done with ratiation". That is Mary. Today, August 24th, was her last day of radiation treatments. Woo Hoo!!!!! Hopefully she does not read this for several days as she is headed to the beach soon to recharge.

That brings me to Andree'. Her mom is a breast cancer survivor but unfortunately she recently lost a cousin to the disease. This weekend she is walking the Seattle Breast Cancer 3-Day 60 mile walk for the cure. She has been training for months. She has four very active kids and her husband travels frequently for work so she was already pretty busy before she started training. Oh yeah, and she had to have surgery herself during the training but that didn't stop her. Her team has raised OVER $16,000.00 for breast cancer research.

Mary and Andree' have never met in person. Well, they may have met at our wedding but I doubt it since everyone was so focused on me....and maybe Jon, but mostly me. Yes people, that is sarcasm. Anyway, they may have never met in person but they have been in each other's thoughts for a while now. Andree' is dedicating mile 24 of 60 to Mary (last day of radiation treatment). I think Mary said it best in a recent email to me..... "Godspeed Andree'!!!!"

Happy Bleeping Birthday!!! **UPDATED**

Tomorrow is Mom's Birthday. And boy does she have some BIG plans for the day. At 5:30 tomorrow morning my Dad is taking her to...............................the hospital for surgery. How's that for a birthday celebration? Over a week ago, Mom broke her ankle in two places. Yep, she busted it up something bad. How did she do this? Well, being the crazy fun Grandmother that she is, she took the Grandkids to the water park on the last day of their summer vacation. Apparently while she was performing some type of dangerous water park trick she fell and broke her ankle. So, she has been off of it for over a week now waiting for the swelling to go down. Tomorrow she will be getting a brand new ankle complete with a titanium plate, screws, pins, nuts, bolts, whatever it takes.

I know the past several days have been tough for her. Picture if you will, the energizer bunny on speed (and without the annoying drum). That's Mom. She is ALWAYS doing something. And it's not that non-productive, spastic type of frenzy that I MIGHT manage to work myself into once a year or so. Nope, it is focused and productive. Frankly, it can be downright annoying sometimes. There is always something to be cleaned, cooked, ironed, straightened, mended, sewed or there is someone to have lunch with, someone to be visited, a meeting at church, a party to go to....you get the picture. Taking it easy is not in her nature. I am not sure that she has totally given up her usual ways. Rumor has it that she was recently seen sitting down, with her foot propped up and holding a yard stick with a towel wrapped around the end so that she could clean the corner of the bathtub. No, I will not reveal my source although I can say that I do consider the source VERY reliable.

During all of this, Dad has been taking very good care of her. He has been doing the grocery shopping, cooking, and waiting on her hand and "foot", mostly foot. Although he apparently missed a speck of dust in the corner of the bathtub, we will let it slide. A couple of days ago, Mom was frustrated about the fact that she would have six weeks of recovery time after the surgery. It was shortly after this post and Dad told her "not to worry, six weeks would go by in no time." She told him if he said that again, she was going to send me to scratch his eyes out. Ahhh she may be down but she's not out. Good one Mom!!!!

So Happy Birthday Mom!!!! Do we get to sign your cast?

UPDATE - The surgery went fine although the ankle was shattered really bad. She stayed in the hospital overnight but made it home today. Lee-Anne, hilarious comment about the butt paste. It won't help the ankle although the cast was irritating Mom's skin and my Dad suggested butt paste for that earlier today. I kid you not.

If You Are Looking For An Adoption Update...

I've heard from some friends and family recently that they check here for adoption updates and haven't seen anything specific lately. The fact that I ramble on about butt paste and disco parties is my way of saying that there really isn't an update. Originally we thought we would be meeting our child this year. Yeah, as in 2006. Oh, that is funny. Then here, I mentioned that it might be 2007 since wait times were expected to increase between 2-4 months. Oh, an increase of 2 - 4 months, those were the days.

At one point I thought that we had experienced our last Christmas, last Mother's Day, last Father's Day, etc. with just the two of us. I TRY not to look at things like that anymore. I am trying to cherish the "just the two of us" time. My birthday was Sunday. I turned 42. Luckily Jon and the friends we were with only made me blow out 1 candle. I could not help but wonder who will be there next year.

We spoke with our Agency today. I really appreciate the effort our Agency is taking to keep us informed. Unfortunately all they are able to tell us is that the current wait is approximately 13 months and the wait can get longer or maybe even shorter. Well that clears that up, doesn't it. There are many complicated reasons for the increase in wait times. Some of it is fact, some of it is speculation. I'm not in the mood to explain it here. I found a way to reset my expectations from a 6 month wait to a 12 month wait. I am in the process of resetting my expectations to an 18 - 24 month wait just in case. I'm not there yet. I know that a child (biological or otherwise) is a blessing, a gift and not something that I am entitled to for any reason. It hurts to admit that but I know it is true. That doesn't mean that my head is not full of "whys". It is.

So, all I can say is if you are reading this, the only update is that we likely still have another year. I've been saying "another year" since last October. Some people must think I am a crazy lady that thinks she is adopting. I'm either running in place or someone is moving the finish line. You will know if there is any news. I wish I could tell you more.

Also, I have said it before but I will say it again. Please refrain from using any of the following:
1. It will be worth the wait
2. Everything happens for a reason
3. It will be here before you know it
4. This is happening so that you can be matched with the child that was meant for you
5. Maybe you will get pregnant before then - ( Yes, we may get pregnant. Goodness knows we aren't doing anything to prevent pregnancy. This adoption is not a substitution for a pregnancy and no we aren't doing this to "save" a child. It is how we chose to grow our family. Period.)
6. Everything worthwhile is worth waiting for
7. Anything similar to the above

If you do say any of these things to me in the near future, I will want to scratch your eyes out. Of course I won't actually do that since with all the delays I will have to be fingerprinted again. But I can't promise that I won't fantasize about it.

Oh, but feel free to leave lots of comments about how I don't look a day over 41!!!!

Have Buttpaste...Need Baby

(EDITED FOR CLARIFICATION)

I guess my Mom wanted to top the stellar present that she gave Jon last Christmas. When she was here recently she presented Jon with a 16oz jar of Boudreaux's butt paste. 16 ounces!!!!! That is a lot of butt paste!! ( It was sort of a gag. Right Mom? A useful gag though. Looks like Jon is going to be changing some diapers!!!!) A few years ago Jon and I tailgated at the Cotton bowl with my parents and the Boudreaux Butt Paste RV was parked near my parent's RV. Jon thought that was the funniest thing he had ever seen. I am pretty sure we have pictures somewhere.

Just in case you haven't heard of this miracle butt paste, people swear by this stuff. It's not just for diaper rash. I had a rash on my finger that nothing would get rid of except for the Miracle butt paste. Of course, we are partial to this particular recipe since it comes from just up the road from my hometown. If you ever have the pleasure of meeting my Mom and complain about ANY type of skin ailment, she will have some butt paste on you faster than you can say Boudreaux. Although the company was recently bought by a company in Indiana, I really hope they keep the production in south Louisiana. Seriously, with Boudreaux in the name, it really can't come from anywhere else.

When I saw the size of this jar, I thought "great, now we can worry about the butt paste expiring along with our fingerprints." But, it seems like it is good until May of 2009. Too bad, I could have orchestrated an essay contest where people could write me explaining why I should bequeath the butt paste to them. Actually, that could get quite scary, never mind.

So, the nursery may not be started and our daughter doesn't have a name (besides LuLu) but at least Mom can stop worrying because we are loaded up with butt paste.

Traded Our Disco Shoes For Some Rock and Roll

Last night we went to the Tom Petty concert with some friends. Even though it was an outdoor concert and it was about a bizillion degrees outside, we had a blast. Very good show. We saw The Rolling Stones last November which was excellent but even despite the sauna situation last night, I think I enjoyed last night's concert more. Yes, he just released a new album but I only counted a couple of songs that were "new". Lots of the old favorites. My voice is a little shaky this morning from singing and screaming. I am sure if everyone would have been quiet and Tom could have heard me, he would have invited me onto the stage. Oh, and Stevie Nicks joined him on stage!!! I wasn't aware that she was joining the concert in some cities so it was a very pleasant surprise. They sang a few songs together including "Stop Dragging My Heart Around." She stayed on stage with her tambourine for most of the concert and took a bow with the rest of the band at the end.
Anyway, I AM TIRED. The last couple of weeks have been nonstop with the nieces/nephews and then a crazy week at work last week. Next week is shaping up to be a "two city" week so I think I am going to be taking it easy this weekend.